Talking to your mortgage servicer when you're struggling — why calling early matters and what to ask
There is nothing wrong with asking your lender or servicer for help. It is a normal part of how the mortgage system works, and the people you will speak with have handled thousands of calls exactly like yours. This page is about one conversation that most homeowners put off too long: calling the company you make your mortgage payment to and telling them you are having trouble.
This is a straightforward guide about what to do when calling your servicer. It covers why making that call sooner rather than later changes what is available to you, what to actually say, what to ask for, and what to do when the first answer is not helpful.
Why calling early matters more than most people realize
Most homeowners wait until they have already missed one or more payments before reaching out to their servicer. That is understandable — it is an uncomfortable call, and there is a natural hope that the problem will resolve itself. But waiting has a real downside.
Servicers can offer more solutions to a homeowner who is current but struggling than to one who is already 90 days behind. Some relief options require that you not yet be in default. Others become harder to access once a foreclosure process has started, because deadlines and legal timelines start running and the window for certain solutions closes. A homeowner who calls before the first missed payment and says "I have lost my job and I am not sure I can make next month's payment" is in a different position than one who has been silent for three months.
Servicers also have a financial reason to want this call. Foreclosure is slow and expensive for them — the process can take a year or more and rarely recovers the full loan balance. Their loss mitigation department exists specifically to find alternatives. Most servicers would genuinely rather work out a solution than foreclose, and they hear from far fewer homeowners proactively than they would like to.
Who you are actually calling — and what to ask for
The company you make your mortgage payment to is your servicer. It may or may not be the same institution that originally gave you the loan — mortgages are frequently sold and transferred, sometimes multiple times. The servicer is the right starting point regardless, because they manage your account and process any relief requests.
When you call, ask specifically to speak with the loss mitigation department. This is the team that handles hardship requests, forbearance, repayment plans, and loan modifications. The general customer service line may not be able to do much beyond taking a message. Asking for loss mitigation by name gets you to the people whose job is to find solutions.
Have your loan account number ready when you call, along with a basic sense of your income, your monthly expenses, and how long your hardship is expected to last. You do not need a polished presentation — the servicer will walk you through their process — but knowing your numbers helps the conversation move faster.
What to say — and how to say it
Be direct and honest about your situation. Explain what happened — a job loss, a medical expense, a reduction in hours, a death in the family, whatever caused the problem — and give them a realistic sense of whether it is temporary or longer-term. Servicers ask about this because the type of relief they can offer depends on it.
A temporary hardship — one where you expect your income to recover within a few months — is handled differently than a permanent change in financial circumstances. As an example, saying "I was laid off three weeks ago, I am actively looking for work, and I expect to be employed within two to three months" gives the servicer something to work with. So does "my hours were cut and I do not expect them to come back — my income has dropped by about $600 a month permanently."
You do not need to have a solution in mind when you call. You can simply say you are struggling and want to understand what options are available. That is enough to start the conversation. Ask them to explain every option they can offer, and ask what the requirements are for each one. Take notes during the call, including the name of the person you spoke with and the date.
Do not feel pressured to agree to anything during the first call. Ask for time to review whatever they offer before you commit, and make sure you understand the terms fully — particularly what happens to the missed or deferred amounts at the end of any forbearance or deferral period.
What your servicer might offer
The options available depend on your loan type, how far behind you are, and your specific servicer's programs. You cannot know what is available until you ask, and the servicer is required to review you for the options that apply to your situation. Common possibilities include:
A short-term repayment plan if your hardship is temporary and you can resume payments plus a bit extra each month to catch up over time. This is often the simplest solution for someone who missed one or two payments and now has income again.
Forbearance, which temporarily pauses or reduces your payments for a set period. This gives you breathing room while your situation stabilizes. Be clear about how the missed amounts are handled afterward — some forbearance arrangements roll the missed payments into a lump sum due at the end, others spread them over future payments, and others add them to the loan balance. These are very different outcomes and worth understanding before you agree.
A loan modification if your financial situation has changed in a way that makes your current payment unaffordable going forward. A modification permanently changes your loan terms — the interest rate, the repayment period, the balance, or some combination. This takes longer to process than a repayment plan and typically requires submitting financial documents, but it can produce a meaningful and lasting reduction in your monthly payment. See more detail on how modifications work is at the NHPB guide to loan modifications.
A referral to a housing counselor. Many servicers will suggest or refer you to a HUD-approved housing counselor if your situation is complicated or if you want independent advice before accepting any offer. Taking them up on that referral is almost always worthwhile — a counselor can review what the servicer is proposing and tell you whether it is reasonable for your situation.
When the first answer is no — or not enough
Servicers can and do deny requests or offer solutions that do not actually fit the homeowner's situation. A no from the first representative you speak with is not necessarily a final answer. You can ask to speak with a supervisor in the loss mitigation department, submit a written hardship request if you have not already done so formally, or ask specifically what documentation would change the outcome.
If you cannot get help directly with your servicer, a HUD-approved housing counselor can step in and communicate with the servicer on your behalf. Counselors know how servicers handle loss mitigation requests, what documentation matters, and how to escalate when a case is being handled improperly. That help is free. More on what counselors can do and how to prepare for that process is at the HUD list by state page.
If you believe your servicer has made an error — applied payments incorrectly, denied you for a program you qualify for, or failed to follow required procedures — you can submit a formal complaint to the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau at https://www.consumerfinance.gov/complaint/. Servicers are required to respond to CFPB complaints, and filing one often produces a more serious review than another phone call.
A broader look at all the mortgage help programs available — government programs, state resources, legal aid, and emergency funds — is at the guide to where to get mortgage help.
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