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Alimony is not enough for my bills

Posted: Wed Nov 28, 2018 10:54 am
by Alibaba
Hi.
I live in Easton, MA 02365. I currently receive approximately $1,850 a month in Alimony from my emotionally and financially abusive, wealthy ex-husband. (When we were first married, I was the "money winner” and paid most of the bills) I recently found evidence he willfully mislead me to believe the proceeds of our home of marriage paid for our soon to be second home of divorce. This was in 2007. We had a Separation Agreement which has been breached in many ways and many amounts due to me were altered and facts changed. I was misled and lied to believe otherwise by my ex-husband, So the year doesn’t matter and the attorney in question, who has altered files from 1999 2000 on opened any prior closed doors as well as other statements in our Separation Agreement that were supposed to be the status quo until death. Our Separation Agreement was not merged at the time of divorce or any other time, but it has been falsified as if this did happen, and manipulated as if visitation schedules were ordered by the court and caused it to be merged. These visitation schedules where not a cause of a merger and were 2 simple changes. Our original divorce decree has been altered by this attorney!
I have piles of evidence showing false orders and fabricated files in our court file. I have evidence refuting he was not responsible for my health insurance and I paid his family health insurance being deducted from my alimony as well as his 401K payments which his company matched, he has over $400,000 in his 401K and this is off by thousands. He has reinvested this in other areas He has a Fidelity Account as well as a Merrill Lynch Account he hides money in as well as others. These voluntary deductions should not be deducted from alimony by Mass Tax Laws.
This is before a judge now and the attorney will certainly be disbarred. She was a no show in court.
I am a still a Trustee and a Beneficiary of a Trust which I just found out still existed. My ex told me we divided it to the children’s college accounts and he has lied, and that was true of the alimony too. Our children have $100,000 each in their college accounts and I gladly deposited thousands in our children’s college accounts but my ex took them and showed the court as if they were his deposits as this account as well as all financial she has controlled. He lied to the court by saying, I had not paid a dime for the children. I just received my proof of my contributions from Merrill Lynch. I paid full child support and he never repaid me. I have that covering as well. He has about 5 financial accounts not one attorney has subpoenaed! I have a QDRO that allows me to receive thousands he owes me returned in 30 days and I need help to organize and find amounts in his accounts. . I do not have the money f or an attorney as I have paid over $200,000 to attorneys and they all believed our court file to be accurate. I never looked at the file as I believed it to be untouchable as a Bible and it is completely altered. Every document is a lie. I have the altered documents I did not know existed until this year. Who would believe a court file could be touched! My ex-husband describes me as a woman I will never be, nor did I know this existed. So much discovery was kept from me.
I have been waiting for repayment and the case keeps getting pushed back. I will see the judge at the end of October and I need help. This is a case of child protection and financial abuse; not child custody!
I must treat this as financial because the emotional side referring to my lovely children has been his weapon to knock me down and distract me emotionally only to take away money. I tried and tried to prove I deserved to be a mother. It has gotten this far by my ignoring this is all financial related. I have evidence my ex owes me at the least; $700,000. However, I cannot wait and my disability causes problems.
The IRS wants $15,000 and I maxed out credit cards. I need a tax preparer or one who knows figures. My disability causes me trouble with organizing files and numbers in financial aspects. I have a Neurologist to verify I have disabilities however, I need to move to the last phase of testing which is the technical steps of testing and the last. I cannot pay for my home insurance and I am afraid of my car being repossessed, and I am scared. I was working towards my R.D and worked with patients at the Hahnemann Hospital when we were married. I have my Real Estate License and I’ve studied and worked in Interior design, and have my license in Specialty Painting and Techniques as well as studied at New England School of Photography. I am mentioning this only to show I had goals and my ex-husband and I decided I would raise our children and finish my RD Degree when his business was steady. He left his family, blindsiding his son with huge losses all of his life. My daughter as well but she is tougher to control and she would give in until recently.
My ex-husband had controlled me and abused me although I completely denied this to myself. I now understand the meaning of a true Narcissist how they can destroy with apathetic entitlement. I was warned by my former brother in law my ex was planning to use my children as tools to “Gain custody (when our children were independent enough) to destroy me emotionally and financially”. He has almost succeeded. I take responsibility for denying his emotional control over me in the past, which has allowed him access to use our children as tools without regard for their well-being. He is denying any responsibility for the emotionally enmeshed relationship with our sensitive son which caused him such damaging emotional distress. He was found in his bed at college shaking and incoherent, leading to his admittance to a psychiatric ward on suicide watch on two sad occasions. Never returning to the dorm and still living with his father at 24. My apathetic ex-husband’s destructive and emotional control and manipulation of our children, are the same techniques used by a kidnapper who eventually manipulates his victims to compliance to his rules, and unearned devout loyalty, with no sense of self, aside from what behavior they perceive as positive attention, or approval from their captor; no matter how self-sacrificing. I must help our children however I need finances to get on my feet. I will never stop trying to repair the damage he handed our family without warning and blind siding our children every major loss has been caused by their father and father blames me!
I am currently being tested for cognitive and short-term Neurological disability due to trauma to my brain, which I denied any serious issues to myself, until it worsened over time, causing me to lose my last job in March, 2012 or 2013 as a part-time receptionist being fired for often forgetting extension numbers of staff, sending calls to the wrong extension; wasting customers time and prevented immediate help to resolve their issues. This was my wake up call.
I need help. I have been ruined financially and although I own this home in full, I am in debt and have lost electricity from nonpayment and my gas is being shut off by Monday morning. I tried assistance and I still receive $1,850 a month in alimony which is too much for any financial assistance for my bills, I was told however, this site gives me hope. I only want help I do not want a hand out. I have donated and worked for the less fortunate since I was a child on welfare! I am not kidding. That is how I was raised. Always give back. I cannot name many who had parents like mine.
I paid the IRS thousands over the years due to my ex-husband manipulating my tax preparer to believe he paid me more than 20,000 more a year than he did. I just picked up my financial files and my tax preparer never told me what happened. However, she takes awesome notes and I have proof. She never admitted this and I paid thousands for years of underpayments. She passed away last year. I was completely unaware of this as I was a truly involved and a loving mother. I never cared about finances and this has allowed my ex to pick my pocket while I defended my ability as a mother. My gullibility or trust for others to care for my financial well-being has allowed this to happen.
I attempted to visit food banks for the first time and I missed the day or the time and I am hungry and my dogs need to visit the vet. I live with constant tooth pain and on anti-bio-tics because I cannot afford the surgery to repair the tooth they cannot pull because it is a danger to do so. It needs surgery.
Please help send me in the proper direction. I will always return favor. I would be so grateful. My lights will be out soon and the Gas on Monday. Help Please. Only for a short time!

Re: Alimony is not enough for my bills

Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2018 12:10 pm
by Admin
If Alimony is not enough, then you need to focus on changing your lifestyle as well as increasing you income. One way to start is to save money on household expenses and bills, and we have tons of tips and suggestions for doing that on our site.

Re: Alimony is not enough for my bills

Posted: Fri Dec 13, 2019 12:15 pm
by Verbal12
I am a mother of 2 children and currently work full time as well as go to school. I am now getting alimony as I am in a situation that the father of my children and I may be separating and I am trying to find my options for housing assistance that is available as the alimony will not be enough for bills. Even though I work full time I do not make enough money to be able to afford rent or bills and would need information such as low income housing or section 8 voucher program; any information is appreciated.

Re: Alimony is not enough for my bills

Posted: Tue Mar 03, 2020 2:17 pm
by Joanne
My husband is in jail at the moment while my daughter and I are back home. The Alimony has stopped. Our water was turned off yesterday. We applied with WADI months ago. As of march I received an approval letter but the city still hasn't received a check. However with that being said even when the check comes in it only covers the gas portion and unfortunately jobs haven't come easily or stayed and we've been struggling. Now trying to take care of bills on my own and raise our child all instantly has been scary and worrisome. I'm still left with a large sum to pay to have our water turned back on. I really need help getting back on our feet and Alimony restarted so I can properly raise our child without putting more stress on her or myself. Any help is greatly appreciated. Thank you.